Please speak lightly

I hadn’t thought ‘lightly’ and ‘politely’ were interchangeable until a letter from a rental vehicle company proved that, indeed, this is so.

We share a Kaipara beach with a decapitated ‘no camping’ sign and another sign some freedom campers ignored. During a preprandial wander, I passed this couple whose van had been parked all day. They were relaxing in deck chairs on the beach. Although the man acknowledged me, the stiff set of the couple’s backs indicated they had no wish to chat.

I walked past the van, past a fire on the beach and . . . .urghhh!!! . . . past dirty pieces of tissue paper near the boat ramp. Yick!!!

As if by karma, a clean plastic bag lay at my feet. I gathered the toilet paper (using the method dog owners have perfected) then approached the stiff-backed couple who told me they were from Europe, that this was their third New Zealand holiday, where they’d been and where they were going.
I politely mentioned the no camping rule, although they must have known, but they declined a camping spot in a nearby paddock. They looked surprised when they learned the beach was popular with boaties and families and that there was a nearby toilet.

“Some naughty people used the grass as a toilet,” I said, indicating the treasures in the plastic bag.

They left the next day leaving wood on a fire that smouldered near dry kikuyu.

What would you do? I wrote to the vehicle hire company, copying the council and government.

Days later a prickly reply from the vehicle rental company informed me I’d made incorrect assumptions and asked why I hadn’t lightly pointed out that camping wasn’t permitted.

Confused, I checked my letter. I’d made no incorrect assumptions - I hadn’t accused the company of not educating campers, but said I’d been unable to find this info on their website. And in the circumstances, was the tone of our interaction relevant? Now I felt prickly.

I replied saying that, in fact, they had made an incorrect assumption as I had spoken “lightly” to the campers and offered them a legal camp site.  

Later I realised I’d misread the grouchy letter. I don’t mean to make fun of the writer’s spelling ability - we have different strengths and weaknesses - but I’d been asked to speak “per lightly” to the campers, i.e. “politely”.

In my chummy reply, I hadn't mentioned that he’d incorrectly assumed I was a bloke or that I felt confident the company would never hire this littering couple another vehicle - that might have been an incorrect assumption.